Maggie’s Make-overs

Carrying on from the overwhelming success of my blog posts Bladders on a Budget and Decluttering for Duchesses, I thought you would all be fascinated to hear about just some of my many up-cycling successes.

For anyone new to the universe of up-cycling, it is the art of taking an unwanted or damaged item and making it into something useful and beautiful again. A sort of re-incarnation for household objects.

I will be blogging more about re-incarnation soon in my upcoming post, Bladders on Buddhism, because, deep down, we Bladder-Warwicks aren’t as shallow as people think!

But back to the topic at hand …

First of all, you need to find a suitable object to revamp and you can find these in:

  • charity shops;

  • sale rooms;

  • the home of a recently deceased relative, if you can get in quick before the good stuff has gone;

  • a skip;

  • or my preferred option, one’s own barns, stables or attics.

So don’t hold back, girls. Get out there. Get searching. And then get it in the back of the Range Rover!

In the meantime, here are some items I have up-cycled recently to give you inspiration. And remember, with the expert B-W tips and tricks I’m about to impart, there’s no reason that your up-cycling projects can’t be equally spectacular!

Take a Pair of Curtains

Old curtains are ideal for making into something new - they don’t have lots of seams or darts, just acres of lovely (lined) silk, velvet or taffeta. So, what is the one garment you simply can’t have enough of? Of course, ball gowns.

So here in three easy steps is your chance to get a unique outfit, for either one’s self or a family member:

  • The first step is to take the curtains down from the window. This can be a bit fiddly as there are usually lots of hook-type things holding the curtain in place. You may need a ladder for this bit. Or a butler. Or preferably both at the same time.

  • Next, fold up the curtains and stuff them into a suitable bag, trunk or case depending on their size.

  • Finally, whisk the curtains off to a local seamstress with your measurements and in a couple of days she will have whipped up a jolly stunning dress for absolutely peanuts!

A couple of B-W tips here:

  • You can keep the curtain trims for the hems of your dress.

  • You can use the tie backs for a waistband.

  • If you have a number of curtains in the same fabric, then you’ve probably got enough material for a set of matching bridesmaids’ dresses and even waistcoats for the groom, best man and ushers.

A word of warning here curtesy of Totty Grunt-Wittering who, as you know, is the uncrowned queen of up-cycling:

If your ball gown is made from your own up-cycled curtains, then make sure you take down all the other curtains with that particular pattern before the evening starts. Totty didn’t on one occasion and guests kept sweeping her aside to get into the garden for a quick fag! And Mungo Horton-Strange ended up caught in her skirt and had to be cut free.

Douglas’ Folly

Recently, Douglas managed to run into one of the estate cottages with his Range Rover late in the evening, coming home from dinner with the Lord-Lieutenant. It was one of those silly little accidents that could have happened to any of us. Apparently, old Mr Boothby, who lived there, was sitting quietly by the fireside when Douglas, who had crashed in through the front window, finally extricated himself from the driving seat. But I digress …

The upshot was the cottage had to be demolished because it was no longer safe and the B-Ws had a pile of rubble to deal with. Now we could have just cleared it away, but instead we decided to build a classical temple. We got an architect to draw up plans and apply to the council for a change of use.

After all the building work was finished, Douglas dedicated it to the Roman God Bacchus, because, although he’d never tell you, he’s actually a serious classical scholar.

But the moral of the story is that we turned something ugly into a thing of beauty with nothing more than a bit of imagination, a pile of rubble, an architect, a surveyor, four builders and sixty-five thousand pounds - and you could too!

And for those of you who like to know every last detail, Mr Boothby is also so much happier now he’s got settled into his sheltered accommodation.

Up-cycled Wallpaper

If your home is anything like Bladder Hall, there are always lots of annoying piles of papers lying about, cluttering up the shelves in the library and lying about on desks just doing nothing - old documents, maps, jottings, old photographs.

But I have found a jolly good solution to the problem.

Provided they are of a decent size, you can paste the papers straight onto the wall like wallpaper to give your room a unique look. Of course, in my case, it does help that I’m an interior design nut as well. Do check out my design service at interiorbladders.com, if you haven’t already.

One word of warning here - please check exactly what the documents are that you’re pasting up before you get really stuck in. Douglas was none too thrilled at having the legal proceedings issued by old Mr Boothby displayed above the dado rail in the breakfast room. And the old Victorian photographs that Patsy Tremble-Bottomley used in her loo raised a few eyebrows, I can tell you!

A final word of advice

And back to dear old Totty Grunt-Wittering for the final word …

As anyone who has read Decluttering for Duchesses is aware Totty famously up-cycled a Sherman tank into a most unusual and attractive flower trough. But, and I know Douglas will agree, Totty has been at it for years!

Her advice here is to work your way up, starting with small projects, say a wheelbarrow, then a dumper truck or an armoured car and only then will you be ready to tackle the more serious military hardware!

In fact, Douglas has just popped over to help her as I understand she is currently transforming an aircraft carrier into a show jumping arena. So watch this space …

Until next time …

Maggie B-W.